Saturday, November 29, 2008

Saturday in Vietnam

Well today has been a full day. We had to move to another hotel, we went and visited the oldest and first university in Vietnam (The Temple of Literature) which is thousands of years old, and we also visited a silk shop road.





It has also been a rough day for us and Ema. She does well while we are out and about walking around the town but when we go back to the room she goes crazy! We wonder if it might remind her of the orpahange or she just doesn't want to be cooped up in the room. It's hard to find a lot of time to blog so we are trying to do it as much as we can. Ema is still clinging to mommy and won't go to anybody else. She only wants to play and throw things at daddy and laugh while doing it. Problem is that she doesn't want mommy to put her down at all. This is totally wearing Emily out but we are tough and getting through it. I want to hold her so bad for my own sake and also to give Em a break. I said today that if she would let me I would take her and walk around this whole city with her while Em gets some rest. She is getting better though with me and hopefully soon she will break through. Here are some pics of the "true" Ema right now that nobody has seen yet!! It hurts to see her so scared and we can't show her enough how much we love her and that we will never leave her.




Here she is just a few minutes later having a good time b/c she is sitting on mommy and mommy can't do anything...

15 comments:

Amy said...

I am glad that you all are getting to see the "sights" in Vietnam. Emily, the picture of you and Ema (at the bottom of the first set of pics)is BEAUTIFUL! Hopefully we'll see some like that of her and Kirk soon. Don't worry Dad, she'll warm up to you. I look forward to looking out of our back windows and seeing you two with a jogging stroller :) Smiles to you all!

~~Kerri~~ said...

Kirk--- Bite the bullet. Take her out. You will know very quickly if it will work. Emily let me share something with you and Kirk. My girls never wanted Brian when I was here. But when I was out, and yes they screamed when I left, they took to thier daddy like fish to water. So let Kirk try to go out tomorrow, if only for a couple hours. Emily, you need to rest and your BODY- needs to rest...
I love sharing in this adventure.
You guys are doing great!!! Hold tight and hold on, GOD IS IN CONTROL!

Krista and Matt said...

Hey guys - Kirk I think you should take Ema out for a while for some father daughter bonding and Em you should do something that you never do - take a nap!!! Thank you guys so much for allowing all of us to be a part of this. Every morning I jump out of bed, grab my coffee and sit in front of the computer for a good hour just going over and over these pics... We miss you

Tammy said...

It saddens me to hear that Ema is having difficulty bonding with Daddy. For I know how Kirk has longed to have sweet Ema in his arms. I have faith that it will soon change. Ema will soon realize that YOU can also comfort and love her just like Emily. After reading the other comments, it looks like you have been receiving some great advice. Some one on one bonding time could be just the thing that you and Ema need. Be patient. God is there with you and HE will help you during this transition. Emily, continue to be strong and rest any moment you can. HUGS! Tammy

mom and dad said...

Kirk you are going to have to get her out by yourself, if not she is not ever going to know that you love her as much as em. Just try to get her out she may cry at first but you are going to have to try. You both are going to be exhausted if you don't try to toss the load back and forth. I promise you she will be fine out with you. She know's that if she cries she can get her way with Em, try it and see! I know she is scared but she is also smart and knows how to get her way. WHEN i WISHED FOR BAD I NEVER WANTED THIS BAD. Please try and see!love DD

FIG AND DAWN said...

Good morning you all. I agree Kirk you should try to take her out and let Emily rest. She's not going to cry forever she should calm down just like she does in the room. At least she is not like Indie she use to get sick from crying because she did not want to leave mom so I had to keep her on my hip. I am so glad that you all able to see the country that Ema is from so she can see the pictures as she gets older. They will be something I know she will enjoy. Emily get some rest. Let Kirk hold her when she is asleep so you can relax your back and body. Take care and be safe. we love you guys. Dawn

Pat said...

I'm back from the river. I called a friend at the bank to get her to read me your blog so I wouldn't get behind. Just read everything and saw the pictures. I know you are exausted! I agree that things will get better but I know you can't see that right now because of your stress and fatigue. One thing that was always hard for me is letting them cry until someone told me that crying has never killed a child. Sometimes you just have to let them do it on their own. That'll be so much easier to do when you can get home and just leave the room. I know by now Kirk has tried to get her out alone. Rule of thumb is 3 on everything. If you can stick your guns for three days they usually adjust. But there, in a hotel room, I can only imagine how horrible that would be. Even when she's out with both of you, make her let Kirk carry her. It won't kill her or Kirk. Emily needs the rest. Just what you need, more advise! We all just love you all so much and hope to say something brillant that will help. Remember that in your weakness God can show His strenth! In your fatigue, don't forget to lean on Him and call out to Him for help!
I love you guys! You'll be home soon!

Cynthia said...

I know it breaks your heart to see her cry...we're praying for her to feel comforted and give her Mommy a little rest. It's such a transition for all 3 of you. Just know that you're doing a GREAT job and you have so many people praying for you and here to support you.

nicole said...

I can see that you have gotten some good advice, but I think you already know what to do...go with your instinct. You're parents now! And I think when we, as parents, try to be in tune to our children's needs like you are trying with Ema, what to do will come naturally for you! I have faith in you, and Ema will soon see (and probably already does) that she has been given the best gift of all...BOTH of you! One day you'll look back and laugh at all of things you did to try to calm her down and make her laugh. Memories that you'll never forget!I love seeing the pictures of you guys out and about sightseeing. It reminds me of myself and a 20 month old John Owen in Germany and Paris, France! Whew! Love to you all!

Laura Dawson said...

It was so good to hear your voices yesterday! I just have one piece of wisdom.....Crying has never killed anyone (at least that is what the doctor told me when Bo cried for the first 10 months of his life!!!

Sarah said...

thank you so much for allowing me to watch your adoption experience unfold. i too, have feelings that our connor will be the one that won't ever look back and won't cry when we get him! we must all do that. but who wants to imagine the difficult part? you're doing great. even with a bio. infant, you just do what works to get you through the tough times, all the while knowing that babies go through many phases and ups and downs...but before you know it, it passes. she will bond with her daddy once she has figured all this out:) and try to get some rest mommy, being a mother is the hardest, most rewarding job there is!

kate said...

Hang in there dear friends. I can only imagine how hard this is for you all (3). I had dinner tonight with a friend who adopted from Guatemala last summer. Their daughter did the same thing. Actually, she still clings to her mommy more than anyone else. But it did get better. It did not take too long for her to figure out that her new daddy could comfort her, too. This is a huge transition for her. Like Nicole said, trust your instincts. Don't do anything you don't feel comfortable doing. I know that crying never killed a child, but neither did too much love.

Pat said...

Emily & Kirk,
From this point forward I'll respond to your blog through the privacy of emails and your telephone calls.

FIG AND DAWN said...

Emily just thought I would let you know that it may snow some here on Monday. Monday is Taylor's birthday so he says give Ema a hug for him for his birthday. You'll get to celebrate it before he does. He will save her a balloon. Thanks for letting us be apart of this journey. God bless talk to you tomorrow. Hope tomorrow is even better. love dawn.

Kendra said...

Even in tears, she's beautiful. Hold on to the promise of Phil. 4:13 and hurry back home! Still sending our love and prayers.